A method for helping another

I have gotten many requests to post more about what I do when I help people as a coach and mental trainer.

The toolbox is large and contains a vast array of methods to help others depending on what they want to achieve. But above all, I hold the attitude that the other person’s interest, desires and goals are more important than any tool or method. I practice winging it more than anything else.

But there is one tool that I often use to help a person get back on his feet. It is a method I have found very effective when dealing with everything from a person coping or struggling to those who consider taking their own lives. This has nothing to do with introspection or therapy – I leave that to others. It has everything to do with getting shit done.

Here’s the simple way you can help another (or yourself):

  1. Tell the person to write a list of everything he hasn’t completed. Everything that nags him, that he thinks he should have done or should do. Every bad conscience. Everything. If it takes a stack of papers, it takes a stack of papers. If the list is short, so be it. But ensure you have exhausted his bad conscience. You are not interested in why the actions wasn’t done or any explanation for them. Forget prioritizations or categorizations at this point. The list can be all messy or upside-down. Doesn’t matter. Just get everything down on paper.
  2. Tell the person to remove everything he no longer has the opportunity or ability to do. This could be items like “Be a firefighter before I become 25 years old” (he is now 35) or “Be the next great goal keeper on Barcelona Football Club” (he is 35 and has a bad left knee). Strike out anything that he can no longer do. Make sure he also removes it from his mind.
  3. Tell the person to remove everything he no longer wants to do. No matter what the reason is, anything that he really doesn’t want to do is removed from the list. Make sure he also removes it from his mind. He now has a list of actions that he can, will and should complete.
  4. Prioritize. In the order of what is really bothering him. The worst shit goes on the top, and all the way down to the more insignificant itches.
  5. Make him do the one thing that bothers him the most. Help him. Complete the action together with him, or sit there while he completes it. Then make him do the second biggest source of worry. Then the third, the fourth and so on. Until you are confident he can do more actions on the list as home work. Follow it through until the person himself is confident he can do anything on such a list all by himself.

check

You do this, and you will have a friend for life. And your friend will have a different life. This happens to be the tool I use that has the most profound effect on a person who is struggling in life.

Try it. Let me know how it goes.

103 thoughts on “A method for helping another

  1. The one thing that nags me the most is doing the list. I thought it was a toss up between the list and housework, but I would rather do housework so it is definitely the list, which gives me the excuse not to do housework.

      1. Thanks, Geir~ I love this. I am a list maker since I was a little kid. I naturally..for years.. do what you’ve said to do. My problem is PAPER. The rest I can list out, plan out and do. However, tackling paper junk—-impossible for me: Most of it IS junk or obviously not needed as I’ve had it for over 6 months! I know, do a bit at a time. I burn out and quit. Any suggestions?

        1. Tory! 😀

          When I help people, I initially make them do the paper exercise as I describe above. When they have overcome their immediate situation and become self sustained in handling life’s problems, then some continue on paper, but most do not. Many keep doing lists on the PC, some then use HyperList (see top link on the page) as their tool. But others manage to do it in their heads. Some drop the lists altogether. As long as shit gets done, it really doesn’t matter what makes it happen 🙂

          Hug to you.

    1. If that person is hospitalizes there is no chance. 95% of MD’s prescribe drugs instead of alternative and logical methods like Geir’s.

      1. Like it, Geir. It is a ‘can-do’ list, builds up ability…that is more and more confidence, competence…which leads to noticing more and more present time, so more and more resources. Your ability triangle…can give back one’s purpose to live. I have never used a list, I will try it to help another, when needed.

        1. I did so. A girl came with a problem this morning. I applied the list. Worked like magic! In this case fast and in a laser precise way the worst shit was uncovered. Solutions and a to-do list followed. She said she could and would do the actions. She also said that she had known deep inside what she should do. It looks, this a list for earlier self-decided (life) but not completed (stopping the flow of life by can’t/but/if thoughts) actions. Will report when she finishes them. May take some time as the issue is indeed one of the basics of life type which, if not completed, can ruin one’s life. In this case the lives of some other persons’ as well to whom the girl is connected. So definitely the clearing of the dynamics of life has started.

          Geir, excellent tool! Thanks, it was a great feeling to use it! Please open your tool-box and put some others on your blog when you have time to do that.

          1. Geir
            As you wrote earlier, implementing what you wrote in your processing article in a company. Your list has just started it, no matter that at a ‘small’ scale. I have already handled some issues with the girl earlier. With that her temporary job got permanent at a company. By doing the actions with the help of your list, from 1-7 and back to 7-1 issues will be handled. Amazing to see how it can work and its possible consequences. Reaching very-very far….

            1. On top of that, the truth is that I love ‘issueless’ persons. Are there? When one comes with some issues, it is fun and joy to be able to help. Now you may understand better why I post from some like Adya, Tolle….the other side is also fun…calm, peaceful, simple, creative. Yes, there are some like that in life, wish there were more.

          2. Report 1.
            The girl did the first action. She applied something on another who had not completed actions for a long time. Now this other person did so. Relief, ease and amazement in the persons (more than these two) involved.

            1. Report 2.
              The girl kept on applying what she had started on another. That person started to do new things and started to communicate slightly to the girl (that person is considered to be hm. almost ‘insane’). Some other signs of the ‘healing’ process also manifested.
              The girl, after seeing that it works (as the above was the worst shit which she came up with the first time), started to write her list as in the first point (first I applied it orally, as she then came right up with the worst problem, which she wanted to start handling immediately). Got excited, cognitions, did not want to stop. Got as a homework to write as many issues as she can.

              (we talked about the ‘start-change-stop’ also…worked like magic…she cognited where the other may have been stopped, also where she had been stopped or she had stopped another, also herself….she came up with actions which she will do).

            2. I decided to write a bit of the background for those interested, that the list works and nothing is impossible.
              Family. Mother ‘officially’ almost insane. Girl is the only one who really wants and does something. She wants to leave home and start a family. She says she cannot because cannot leave the mother there (girl is in a long time loving relationship with a boy). There is also a father living with them. Girl does the first action as in report one. Real healing, com and actions from mother start. Girl sees that the origin of the issue is earlier, in grandma’s time who also had problems before she died. Girl does not want to ‘inherit’ it, also, wants children. Girl is very aware, does actions.
              As I see it now, the list can indeed ‘save lives’, even far-reaching for future kids.
              On both occasions it took 1-1 hour which I offered to her as an act of friendship.

            3. Report 3.

              The girl completed two cycles. Started two new ones, which she is very excited about and give her continuous success. One issue is on the edge of completion. The worst two are in progress, actions are being taken.
              The girl said that she loved this tool.

            4. Report 4.
              The girl completed one of the worst cycles. It is very interesting as she wanted to
              talk with another about some issues they had had earlier – that was what she said when we met earlier and decided to get into action. What happened was that she accidentally met the person, looked at him (with complete confront) and the whole
              issue blew. She said she felt one of the hugest reliefs in her life. Cycle over.
              She started to be very creative in one of her cycles, getting it into mastery is in progress.
              She understood the tool so well that she is doing it by herself and we have to spend
              only a couple of minutes on discussing the results which she loves telling me about,
              like today.

            5. Report 5.

              As it looks, the girl’s ‘milk allergy’ got handled. Uses the tool and she always communicates about the current results. Her employer noticed the changes in her
              new management skills and gave her gifts that will help her expand them. Her mother started to communicate much clearer.

      2. dragos72
        I am not sure, dragos. I recall helping hm. counting…several persons who took different medicine with communication only. Part of the being, the mind always perceives, no matter what. If you can ‘penetrate’, that is ‘connect’ to that part and
        can ‘fuck’ the drugs, also, completely accept what they say, it works.

  2. I did mimic one in an asylum above Vinaire, without the drugs, but by the mere ability to openly ‘complain’ about my predicament of not being able to do the above, has opened up the other goals that were getting in my way to do the above. So indeed, the list does come first, BUT I will be going between the ‘two stops’ in my life to resolve them.

  3. The most important is by far the 4th. Everybody has to have priorities and goals in life and foloow them. The most difficult is the 2nd and it’s a big problem there.
    Why should I supress myself my own dreams and desires? Ironically, as in the 2nd tool, my left knee is damaged 🙂 and I’m more than 35, I’m 40. But if in the backstage of my mind I still dream to be an elite handball player, even if I know it’s impossible…and if my dreams are harmless, why should I correct myself? 🙂 Nobody ever died due to a bit of fantasy 🙂

    1. You may want to move an item from the Should Have Done-list to the Dreams-list, but that’s another matter. Because then you move the item from the troubling/worrying/nagging-list to a far more pleasant list 🙂

      1. hehe…my mind says you’re right, but my heart never allowed me to throw my dreams list in the garbage bin 🙂

  4. The first thing my wife and I did when we left Co$ two years ago was dig out an old copy of “How to Take Control of Your Time and Your Life” by Alan Lakein, in many ways similar to your 5 steps above. Once the artifical panic of “going up the Bridge” has been removed and the artificial PTS environment that Co$ creates has faded, you’re free to “get shit done” as you say.

    1. Once the artificial panic of “going up the Bridge” has been removed and the artificial PTS environment that Co$ creates has faded, you’re free to “get shit done” as you say. Thank you for that statement! What a great description of a cult environment where artificial is the new reality. I’m so grateful living a life where artificial is cancelled. I even drink REAL sugar.

  5. Really excellent tool! I’ve been doing this in a haphazard way and it really has tremendous impact. I find that it is really cathartic as well! Laugh and cry.

  6. A very practical tool. Thank you for sharing it. I agree that for anyone in any type of overwhelm, having a coach sit and be available to listen to their considerations about the process would be most valuable. I did a similar process many years ago. There was a list of topics to help prompt for these incomplete items; i.e., work related, family related, health, hobbies, etc. It worked well for me at the time.

  7. I can see that the above solution will work with those who retain their ability to be mindful. It is called “un-stacking the mind” in KHTK. I know it is more general in KHTK, but the basic idea is the same.

    It would be impossible to do this, though, with a person who is too traumatized to be mindful. I find that, in such a case, establishing mindfulness toward physical reality may take priority over making a list, which would take some mental effort.

    .

      1. I looked up the word mindful Vinaire. Are you attempting to promote your own business? See, my mistake in my current frame of mind was to look for little bits of distraction and motivation while I look and do this program in my traumatic state of mind,, hoping for confirmation and feedback that others were willing to give this a go instead of only reading it. I hope hope hope others see it as a game and are giving it a go also. .

      2. Mindfulness is a concept from Buddhism. It was taught by Buddha as “seeing things as they are without any additives.” In my view mindfulness is made up of the following:

        1. Observe without expecting anything, or attempting to get an answer.
        2. Observe things as they really are, not as they seem to be.
        3. If something is missing do not imagine something else in its place.
        4. If something does not make sense then do not explain it away.
        5. Use physical senses as well as mental sense to observe.
        6. Let the mind un-stack itself.
        7. Experience fully what is there.
        8. Do not suppress anything.
        9. Associate data freely.
        10. Do not get hung up on name and form.
        11. Contemplate thoughtfully.
        12. Let it all be effortless.

        Normally, a person is able to be mindful towards their thoughts, feelings, emotions and impulses. But not when he is extremely traumatized. That was the case with Lisa McPherson.

        Such people have lost mindfulness even toward their physical environment. Mindfulness towards one’s mental environment cannot be restored until mindfulness towards one’s physical environment is restored to some degree.

        Hubbard was right in coming up with Objective Processing. But he applied it for hours on end also to those who did not need it.

        .

    1. I have saved several people’s lives with this approach. And many have gotten problematic patches in their lives straightened out. Try it, Vinaire.

      1. Maybe tools only are just not enough…It have to be something else added. Let’s say a kind of native capability to iinteract and to be understood by the subject person. Maybe you have it, Geir, and Vinnie not. Who knows?

        1. Maybe. But that’s a good reason to post it here and see if others get similar results using it. So guys, please try it out and tell me how it worked.

          1. You cannot imagine how difficult it is to try this, Geir. Vinnie is right, even I’m not always agree with him. Seriously, your method is 100% suitable for some people, but not for everybody. The only person in this world I want to help is a gentleman, smart, polite but suffering of schyzophrenia paranoid. He lives in his own world. He imagine everday scenarios that never, ever happened. It is so pity, it’s a lost soul. As Anette told me, people like them never cure. And even if I don’t want to, I totally agree with her. Your tools are for normal people, Geir. For depressed, or jobless, or distracted, or divorced, or teenagers who’re searching for a way in life. But normal people…Unfortunately, not all of us are normal…

            1. The prerequisite is of course that there are people you want to help. If you there are lots of people you want to help then there is a chance of finding some that would benefit from this method.

            2. Finding??? There are a lot of people, all over the world who are in need. Agree with your method, just a bit skeptical that is fitted to everybody. For me, a normal person can be healed by itself (your method included). I’m skeptical for others, that’s all…Anyway, your intention and your results are more than worthwhile 🙂

            3. dragos72
              I see. You may try something. Do not speak to him. If he is speaking to you, look at him and stay silent. You can assure him with your eyes, with a natural smile. AND
              FEEL him. Just FEEL him. Without any thought in your mind. As much part during your meeting as possible. The rest can be talking.
              Hm. I did so…helped an autistic and a girl with a heavy mental issue. Partly with this.

            4. Dragos, I will recommend applying CCH 1-4 to this person. These are the most fundamental objective processes from Scientology. I think they can help the person you are describing. I am incorporating CCH 1 – 4 in KHTK.

              .

          2. Currently I am emotionally bouncing all over the place, but of course I haven’t finished part one. I am amazed how many of my goals have been misplaced or replaced. No wonder I am at a ‘dead stop’.. :O

    2. Let’s talk functional crazy.

      There are some fucking amazing crazy people: Hemmingway (Bipolar disorder), Churchill (Alcoholism), John Nash (schizophrenia), Kurt Godell (Paranoia) , Amy Winehouse (Depression and Addiction) …

      And nobody, and I mean NOBODY, is working first to help people exploit their crazy for good as a primary practice.

      Have you ever noticed that you never see the tagline, “We Make Crazy Work!”?

      THINK about the genius we have lost because we have dishonored crazy. How many Kurt Godel’s are cowering from paranoia? How many Hemmingways blow their brains out with a shotgun before the first book? How Many John Nashes wallow away in mental wards not knowing that within that slurry of madness is genius our world desperately needs?

      I never treat a crazy person with contempt. Why? Because crazy and genius go together like oil and water. And if you don’t think oil and water go together, go look at a salad dressing bottle.

      The tools Geir authored, Hyperlist, Amar, and this structure above will never fix crazy. But in competent hands, they may help release its hidden gems that only crazy can create and bring structure to an unstructured mind.

      So it can keep its promises.

      1. The people side of genius is grossly under appreciated. Everyone loves Douglass Adams’ books, but nobody thinks to realize that his editor was the real muscle that gave Adams the human structure to get it done.

        The ONLY reason he was able to write the Hitchhiker books is because his editor booked two rooms in a hotel (one for him and one for Adams) and wouldn’t let him leave until he finished his current project.

        “I love deadlines. I love the sound they make as they go whizzing by.” – D.Adams

        Tools change people.
        People change people.
        The right people, with the right tools, mentoring the right people suited for them change the world.

        Helen Keller didn’t need Sigmund Freud. She needed a blind Anne Sullivan.

      2. Yes! Great post! Crazy cannot be ‘understood’. Knowing some, working occasionally with one, it’s a completely different ‘viewing, perceiving, acting and living way’. They are kind of ‘alone’ which can result in being ‘lonely’ at times. So there are the consequences you listed. I know some, who can tolerate aloneness…young students come to mind.
        ‘In competent hands they may help release its hidden gems that only crazy can create’….yes and yes. I would add that ‘crazy’ is in fact ‘normal’. Kind of zero ‘social’, just from intuition, from the core ability of life. Haha…can be quite functional
        as I have seen it from some.

        1. Yes to your second comment too. I worked with..hm. in short, someone close to genius does not care, may not even know how to do practical, or social things. So besides truely seeing their genius, one can give them practical help. Also, help not lose the ‘sparkles’ when they come….some around such a person can invalidate it, which unfortunately happens as I have seen it.

  8. I concure! This tool saved my life, but 4. Prioritize is not something I totaly agre with. If you take some of the easy stuf first you may feel the sence of acomplishment and that was the grate motivator of getting my engin started. But it turnds out that this is not just a tool to get a person out of a ruff patch. It is a grate lifestyle. If you aplay it to you dayly wants and needs you become super man. For thoes of you that know me the world will soon not be enught at this rate.

    1. The Magic Bjørn!

      After we did the list for your life, I started doing #4 and Sit With the person until the worst shit was done. It makes that sense of accomplishment that much greater and the fear of list items that much smaller. But unless I can sit with the person throught hte worst items, I agree with the approach we did.

    1. I had a win on the first part. An obvious win, based on the jealousy game people play. This is where I currently left off. I also have repeated my previous win of most of my goals I have accomplished. And I am really bad at accomplishing other peoples goals. Thanks for listening and being there.

      1. After the first day, understanding one of the games persons would play, I rediscovered a few of my own goals and put them to the front. I would like to continue this process, I suspect I have been caught up in wondering what in the world people were doing,most of it really made no sense to me. I do suspect this process will help me from being side swiped in the long run also.

  9. “#4. Prioritize” is really not needed. Priorities are automatically determined as in #5, by taking up things in the order in which they bother the person.

    From KHTK:

    Let the mind un-stack itself.

    Simply look at what is right there in front of the mind’s eye. If there are many issues out there, let the mind choose what to look at first. Observe the issue uppermost in the mind, and then the next, and so on. There should be no effort to recall or to dig into the mind. The mind will never present anything overwhelming when allowed to un-stack itself.

    .

    1. Quite often, when I coach people and use this tool, the person doesn’t come up with the biggest problem right away. Sometimes he is reluctant or embarrassed to say it, and other times it doesn’t come to him until he has told a few minor issues that bothers him. This is why, when we are actually, physically tackling these problems, it is wise to prioritize before heading for the phone or grabbing the paint bucket.

  10. Then reluctance and embarassment needs to work itself out first. It cannot be any other way. Any effort to bypass natural un-stacking will only prolong the process.

    .

    .

    1. Vinaire, My method above cannot be compared to KHTK in any meaningful sense. I am not talking about a therapy or mental exercise. I am talking about actually tackling the shit that needs to be done. Like opening mail, calling grandma, getting to work, moving that boulder, cleaning the house. And then it often happens that the person comes up with the real bad problem after some minutes of talking (and coming up with lesser problems) and Then we get moving and handle that biggest problem. Works like a charm.

      1. HaHa…the first flow of some martial art from you, Geir! No Katageek style, please, you have got a couple of hours to devise your own before you enrol for any of the courses there! Just keep up your creativity as you have done so far!

      2. Funny, after you guys visited, my formatting went all wacko. Hmm. Weird internet.

        The point of the now jumbled article, is that the abilities of Hubbard’s coveted Clears could MOSTLY be accomplished by such a system. The abilities of a clear can be achieved by training without a moment’s worth of auditing.

        Remember when that guy asked Hubbard’s first clear while she was on state what was on a certain page number in Dianetics? People can be trained to read THAT well with the Greek’s memory methods. There is a Japanese man who can do that with a Japanese-English Dictionary. He’s not gifted. He’s trained.

        A year’s worth of memory training can create people who can memorize a deck of cards in 30 seconds, pages of numbers on one reading, and retain over 80% accuracy of a speech. You can train yourself to use a memory palace to retain an entire book’s main ideas in order as you read it. You can become a human calculator in 12 months pretty easily.

        And a lot of this stuff is on your iPhone. Mathmagics has a great ap that can turn you into a human calculator with consistent effort.

        Now the “No colds thing” on Clears is impossible. Fuck it.

        1. Actually, 30 seconds was the world record for card memorization. A years worth of training with PAO system could do a deck of cards in 3-4 minutes for almost anyone.

        2. Bottom Line? If you trained someone for two years thirty minutes a day in memory, thirty minutes a day in mathmagics, thirty minutes a day in Tonglen and thirty minutes a day in micro-emotion training and YOU WOULD HAVE MOSTY WHAT HUBBARD’S DEFINED AS CLEAR.

          Throw in an hour of martial arts and HOLY SHIT!

          Three hours a day for two years.

          Sans the cold thing. You’re screwed on the colds.

          On the down side, you do have to keep memory palaces cleaned and reviewed constantly, It kind of becomes a spiritual practice. So there is a lot of internal work required to retain large blocks of data within your head.

          And it REALLY helps to start this as a youth. It still works as we get older but a lot slower going.

          SUGGESTED READING: “Moonwalking With Einstein” by Josh Foer.

  11. Oh, and if you want to get people to REALLY BELIEVE AND EXPERIENCE OT EFFECTS IN REAL TIME take some notes from these guys. Believe me, there are some true believers NOW. Copy and paste this in YouTube’s search …

    “Telekinetic Coffee Shop Surprise”

    Remember, as future cult leaders, we don’t need our super powers to be real our followers just have to THINK they are real.

    Mwa-ha-ha y’all.
    Mwa. Ha. Ha.

    1. To Summarize: The majority of Clear Abilities are actually possible with established training techniques. But to demonstrate OT we can only lie and be evil cult leaders and use special effects.

      And everyone here is SO over the latter. And may it not happen in this group again.

      You are launching something in a few months Geir. If it is tech, please teach Lifton.

      Peace.

      1. The prospect of Clear is much better as one doesn’t have to put in any effort to train these abilities. It’s a much better quick fix. And we know how much Man loves quick fixes – the lottery, the weight loss pills, pills for this and that. Training… too damn hard.

  12. What else can I say on this but “Amen”. Yes, the clue are all the things in the list AND sitting together with the person, I think. It will give the person a sense of being helped OR protected, AND keep him / her focus …

    The (faith !!) belief that you are being helped, have helped MANY people, the list is keeping mind AWAY from remembering all the things that must be done, AND on what to do right now ….

    There is a nice description of this in the nice little book called “The art of Thinking Clearly” by the swiss Rolf Dobelli.

    Sometimes I’ve used a similar approach in the beginning of implementations, on of the problems in those periods are keeping folks focused on planning and work, instead all the “what-ifs” and “maybes” they have in their mind.
    So in th eplan meeting I start with giving everyone a sheet of paper and ask them kind of like above, to write down all the things they’re worried about.

    Some writes furiously for 15 mins, other 4 secs. Anyway, all the papers go in stack.
    Then we discuss plans for whatever need time.
    Then when we’re completely finished, I ask them to pick out their sheets again and them one by one list all of them on a large piece of paper or on a blackboard.

    When everone have finished, we go through together, could this be removed due to things we have talked about during the planning, or else what can we do with this problem.

    This will usually leave behind a VEEERY short list, like 1-3 items.
    And then we can discuss, does this mean we can’t go on, or do we just have to accept this ONE all of us together (’cause sometimes one has to …)

    Works wonders … Folks are so relieved and walk out 40 pounds lighter …

  13. Very interesting approach for clearing ones mind.
    For all I liked your points #1-3. I’ll include it into what I am doing.

    I practice a different technique in terms of priorities (#4 and 5): I don’t start with what bothers me most but what needs to be done asap in order to prevent catastrophies. As first all that needs to be done looks like a huge mountain the beginning I break it down by fitting in small bits of the mountain into a schedule with sufficient time for everything. Then i move forward just doing what’s on the day’s schedule, So I don’t need to worry about neglecting something terribly urgent while being busy with my current activity. (This would happen if I followed your plan. And I might really miss important deadlines).
    I think that the most important thing is to START.

    1. Good point. The most immediate catastrophe-causing points will usually be the ones that bothers the person most. But from point #4, there is no hard and fast rule that will cover all cases. Common sense and winging it enters in spades 🙂

    2. What can also be a good start: To have someone who opens the letters you had received for the past 6 months. And who makes order in different sorts of papers. In the end there is a list of things that need to be done, with different priorities.
      It is an easy job for a person helping while already the idea of opening all those letters is a nightmare for the person in trouble.
      I know what I am talking about. I’ve been on both sides.

  14. Regarding your methods, claims and Vinny’s thing about mental illness.

    After you run this module, you obviously will send someone to either Hyperlist or some other method to help keep the momentum strong.

    But as mentioned before, it is people that make the difference. And the human part of this concept varies on the person being helped.

    An average person may do just great and not need any more help.
    A person with ADD may need help for three sessions and then be fine.
    A person with severe ADD may need help and weekly follow ups forever or the lists collapse.
    A recovering stroke patient may need help every three days or the lists collapse.
    A person with schizophrenia may need someone to help daily or the lists collapse.
    A person with dementia may need it three times a day or the lists collapse.
    A person in a coma needs you to run all lists or they collapse.

    Again, change comes from people and a person must first be realistic on what they can consistently offer another. And (s)he must be able to properly assess the amount of human interaction a client requires to maintain adherence.

    A one to three month adherence may be possible for many, but persistent change is the real drag and for that to occur, persistent PEOPLE need to be involved.

    It’s easy to get a two month success story with high feelings and glowing letters. It’s another to make a person who has never kept lists actually keep lists for the rest of her life.

    It would be cool if a service existed that used contact management software to support such change on phone or Skype. I don’t think one exists but it would be cool if it did.

    1. And regarding the “Stop It” video above.

      It would work. But only if she met with the therapist repeatedly in her real world. As her world really is. Otherwise, it would have a high fail rate I’m sure. But if she met with him over time, the human connection would be more likely to create lasting change.

      EXAMPLE: If he went with her down a tunnel while she drove and as she tensed up he put his hand on her shoulder with care and whispered “stop it.”

      THEN. And only then. Could his therapy be strong enough to actually affect change.

      And that applies to almost any therapy.

      Good people – over time.

  15. Geir
    In our exchange above I had experienced it for the first time how subtly and brilliantly the analytical mind operates. You presented the possibility to experience it. Thanks. I also had a perception that it can indeed be a trap when one is not using it absolutely freely.
    I wonder what connects one to not using the analytical mind as a completely free tool. Or, what you wrote earlier, the possibility of being in a condition when this tool is not needed at all. Any idea?

  16. Another aspect: what can be the origin of ‘double-think’? The word ‘double’ means a dichotomy. A dichotomy of two opposing thoughts. What is aware of the two thoughts? Awareness. What is the root of the thoughts in opposition (conflict)?

    1. Hello Miss Marianne. If your reference to ‘double-think’ is to 1984 from George Orwell, then you may want to study the subject of ‘cognitive dissonance’. That’s not been shown on the Scientology papers, despite it was a contemporaneous assessment and was proved scientifically.
      A cognitive dissonance is not a good thing at all. It’s a magnitude of the internal tension of a “unstable datum” if you prefer. The way a cognitive dissonance gets relief is matter of discussion. People do anything, mentally speaking, in order to get relief. Believing in something is the general outcome. People react to their own cognitive dissonance, because they don’t want to change their point of view. It’s almost impossible to maintain two contradictory thoughts equally in validity, it’s almost biblically “you can not serve two masters”. The really insane thing is that people could be trained to “resist” cognitive dissonance until is necessary in order to preserve the interest conflict of a third party. A short and very well known example of this is the people who “resist” to scientific evidence or scientific facts and persist believing their debunked imaginery. We all can see this and it’s called “brainwashing” from cult’s attitudes or cult’s leaders.

      On a cognitive and constructivist perspective, all the cognitive biases from the list are the attempts of relieving this phenomenon. I hope this ‘depersonalized’ answer may be useful to you.

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